I wear reading glasses. Lucky for me, I’ve only needed minor changes over the years. I’m referring to the prescription part. Every three or four years I buy two pair of glasses, one to wear and one spare. Last month I had to use the spare as, once again, I sat on my glasses and this time the damage was lethal. It happened a few days after my yearly eye exam so I headed to my favorite eyecare store with the new prescription.
I pick my frames the same way I pick my shoes, by weight. Before you roll your eyes and decide I’m beyond weird, let me explain. You wear footwear on your feet, every time you take a step you lift your foot off the ground. Don’t you think that if a shoe weighs, let’s say seven versus fourteen ounces, after a few hours of walking your legs feel the difference? It’s like lifting weights. And while you don’t lift your glasses with your nose—or maybe you do—said glasses do sit on the bridge of your nose and at the end of a long day the weight makes a difference. Hey, some of us with a delicate skin nose have red marks to prove it.
When I went back to pick up the glasses, free cases came with. Black. Like mini coffins. And again, my weight consciousness kicked in because the case holding my glasses will be in my bag. On my shoulder. I ended up keeping one of the black coffins for the spare and paid for a shiny purple case lighter than a feather, okay let’s make that two feathers, for the glasses to wear daily. By the glances from the few people waiting I gathered they clearly assumed I was a total loony toony.